Here comes another blog. No worries. It’s not another flashback stories from me again. Last week, my mid-term examination had ended. I was kind of relief and afraid all at once. Again in my life, I screwed up some papers. I never had a perfect examination that in line with all my hard works and efforts that I poured in. Why there is always being misfortunes? I always ended my examination with a sinking heart. I don’t know how much I can take it anymore. I wanted to lament everything out but I just couldn’t. Don’t ask me why because I myself don’t even know why. What I want to cry out just couldn’t come out from my mouth. I felt that there is a filter within me. It’s not that I don’t want to express out or keep everything secret. Everything I wanted to say being filtered. There is always something holding me back from doing it. In the end, everything just goes into one place-my heart and locked in tightly. That’s why most of the people think I am cool and quiet. No one can ever understand me or have the key to unlock my heart.
Even in university, got people said I’m cool. I just wonder why. Different people have different opinions on me. I always laugh and smile at everywhere but why there are still people say I’m cool?? Okay. Of course when in lecture or tutorial, I very seldom talk and in full concentration but after that, I was laughing and fooling around with my friends. Sometimes, I really couldn’t make head nor tail of what they were thinking. I agreed that I’m really quiet and out of topics most of the time whether in reality or virtually. But this is who I am.
Recently, I just got my results for my Business Communication paper. I got the highest marks in my class-89 marks. Actually, there are two classes of Business Communication subject. Each class has approximately 200 students. After I finished that paper, got people asked me how tough was it and I just told them I don’t know what the hell I’m writing just now. I was like crapping from the beginning till the end of it. I don’t have the mind that my answers are correct. After I got the results, some people thought I am some sort of faker and liar. Oh, please! I myself also shocked with my results. In point of fact, there is nothing to proud of even I get the highest marks because there are peoples obtaining 88%, 87%, 85% and so on. The gap between the marks is just merely 1 or 2 marks. So, what should I proud of? It’s just my luck and I’m not boasting about it! If there is a big gap, it may prove I’m good in that subject. However, the gap is small! So, what’s the deal?
One day, my friend from other course congratulated me for getting the highest marks in the paper. I was like “What on the earth he got to know about it?” Then, I asked him how he knew about it and he told me that he heard people from my course talking about my name and the highest marks when he walked past. Okay. I really don’t know whether it’s a good thing or not. I don’t want people to think nonsense about me or take me as a benchmark. May be I think too much. But for analytical purposes, I just made a thought of it. I just want to be a normal student. I just want to get good results to maintain my scholarship. Besides, it pressured me a lot if people labeled me as top student or what. What happens if I get the highest marks for this subject and screwed up the rest of the remaining papers?? If that happens, surely there will be a whole lot talking about it.
Now I am having lots of assignments to cover up. After exam week, here comes the assignment weeks. After that, here comes the exam week again. Oh yeah. For your information, when I was enduring exam week, there was a week where I had to take three papers and passed up two assignments. Hell yeah! It’s totally out of the mind. Luckily, I managed to squeeze through and screwed up some papers. Haha! Here’s a little update about me. Check out for another blog which I don’t know when. ChaoZZZzzz.
No comments:
Post a Comment